Love is a cruel game sometimes, especially when it plays out more like a bothersome jape as opposed to the poetic mastery that is promised in all those rock songs,
But I'm not ready to give into the blues just yet, even as a wild, schitzo, loud mouthed, obnoxious and often arrogant writer, art broker, storyteller and all around digital demonic fucking badass, I am as always weak for those women who I immortalize so well in comics and art with the help of fantastic fantasy team of artists, writers, and analyzers,
I fell hard for a pixi, a pixi who mind you wastes her time taking care of the human version of dying pet, who only exists to wallow in a fake depression in public so everyone can see him to feel bad for him while he wastes the best years of this beautiful angel's life,
And to be even more contrarian, I told exactly how I felt, even at the cost of losing the friend, the pixi, the muse, every role and every thing I have made her out to be can fly right out the window because she may never understand how intense a man I am,
And yet even after deflecting my advances, even after giving off the vibe that I can claim this fantasy i want and must claim from the clutches of this mediocre monster that has my spot, my place, my story,
And he wastes it,
So what can you do but walk away, accept the loss, book some hot Colombian hooker or three or four and just release all anger for the lady in a nice freshly blown load,
I even sat in Miami traffic on the way to Master Varese's house to pick up some art commissions, anxiously rolling through the rolodex to pick out which lady of evening would be receiving my anger,
And I didn't want any of them.
That's what love does, it ruins everything,
I cursed the girl, I cursed the cunt of boyfriend, I cursed God for putting this lust in my heart and letting this fuckin granola goddess go to waste with a shit who won't be a man and take this angel by the shoulders and ravage her,
I felt the rage of the bulldog inside me telling me fuck her, and yet here I am, staring across the bar at this fuck, buried in another video game, telling myself he's got what I want and he won't take it,
So why stay, why waste your time and mine blithering on and on about this subject,
Because I had to look at from a different perspective,
Like always I think CONTRARIAN,
I didn't get the girl, but I got into the steam room, the swimming pool and the jacuzzi, every day without fail,
I worked out every day because I wanted to be a visual object of her desire,
I busted my ass on every Kickstarter and Commission and Comic Book in order to put myself in the financial position to impress her,
I made up with old friends and stopped hissing and every asshole who asked me an asshole question (OK I'm lying but I am trying to be nicer)
Point is my friends, I became a better man, a full time writer, a happier man, a man desired by women of all ages and tax brackets, all because I constructed myself into the man I thought this girl would want without any fucking guarantee that I would get her,
She became my treasure, the object of my journey,
And I realized going after her has gotten me to this better place, a better man, a monthly income from Kickstarter,
This is the kind of stuff dreams are made of,
And here's the latest update to this story before I shove the link in front of you and tell you to help me get to 200%
Last night I had meeting with Coach Cosie & my new secretary RoCKSy (Nickname in progress) to talk about throwing a live party at a new bar that I like to toss a few pints back at,
You see I'm taking the comic book signing party out of the fucking comic book store and putting it into a bar and tavern with art and cosplay and beer and hopefully the beginning of an empire's expansion.
During this meeting I was going on like my usual crazy self, loud and obnoxious while trying to use my damaged brain to storm out the rest of the details,
When I look down from my diatribe, who did I see hanging out at my table at Faro's Lounge,
THE PIXI,
You see my friends, even at my worse,
She still wants to be around me,
This fuckin story is far from over,
Just on a boring pause till I make my next move,
As soon as I figure out what the fuck it is,
Till then, pledge fuckers,
https://www.kickstarter.com/projects/hooligansco/faros-lounge-sketchbook-maryland-edition-mega-city
Cheers,
FK
